Pregnancy Hospital
by angelsinstead
Summary: Someone's coming back from the dead while others are seeking to become pregnant. Don't miss an exciting episode of Pregnancy Hospital!
1. Episode 1

Episode One

He awakened in the morgue of Pregnancy Hospital. He felt stupider than usual although he was still hideously ugly and his same ole wicked self. His hair was a puffy and grey, but he realized that there was nothing inside the skull below it. "My brain is missing!" he cried out as he jumped up off the metal slab in the morgue with anger seething inside him. "I decided to return from the dead like all those soap opera people do, only to find out that some jerk has STOLEN my brain."

He started searching around and found a large plastic bag that was sealed and had his name on it - CESAR FAISON. Without his brain, he was struggling to function, but he managed to pull out his clothing and dress himself. The song from the Wizard of Oz was haunting him at that moment - _If I Only Had a Brain_.

Suddenly he realized it wasn't just his brain he was missing. Where the hell was his lighter?! It was his favorite one! Someone TOOK his lighter. They must pay. He swore he'd make the thieves suffer - the ones who stole both his lighter and his ridiculously evil brain. First he would find Leisel O., his main squeeze. He was sure she could help him pull off his diabolical plot. He had to find Dr. O or maybe even Anna so he could harass her like a creepy stalker. He realized in that moment that he was thinking with his other head, the one that was big, hard, and throbbing. He had to find a woman soon!

~*~o~*~

Brad had babies on the brain. He had concocted a plan with a wicked woman. Her name was Janelle Benson (also known as Nelle). Everyone hated her, because she was such a nasty bitch, but Brad was a no-good bastard, so they got along just great.

"I need to make Michael love me, so I want to get pregnant ASAP," Nelle stated. "Brad, will you help make me pregnant?"

"Sorry, I don't swing that way," Brad replied. "I have a _husband_... or have you forgotten?"

"No, you idiot, I just need you to go into the hospital lab and steal me a cup of sperm!" Nelle commanded.

Brad stared at Nelle as the little wheels were turning in his ever-so-shady head. "I have an even better plan," he told Nelle with a grin.

~*~o~*~

She was so hungry! Her vagina was throbbing with excessive juices and she knew from experience the only thing that could ease that particular ache was fresh, hot, fertile sperm!

Elizabeth had a longing to get pregnant ASAP, but her fiancee had stated he didn't want to have any children, because he didn't want to pass on his evil DNA. She already had three wonderful boys, from three different daddies.

Cameron had came downstairs one day and all the sudden he was a teenager. Puberty had hit, so with one of her kids almost grown, Elizabeth's womb was aching to be filled up again.

*Whatever will I do?* she was thinking. *I want to have a baby so bad, but Franco doesn't want to knock me up like all the other guys did. I don't want to make him mad. Ohhhh I know, I will just go out and fuck a whole LOT of guys and then when I have a little bun baking in my oven, I will tell Franco I got pregnant by a sperm donor!*

Elizabeth got a pad and paper and started writing down a list of potential guys who might help her do the dirty deed. So far on her list she had written- Sonny Corinthos (because that guy was as fertile as FUCK), Coleman (because he always was practically BEGGING to get laid), Drew (because he was cute and hot, but ever-so-lonely after his break-up with Sam), and Griffin (just because he had a to-die-for sexy body).  
She wasn't going to let the fact that Griffin was an ex-priest stand in her way.

Franco came up behind Elizabeth and stared down at her list. "What's that?"

"Ohhh nothing, honey. I am just...uhhhh ...thinking of people we could invite to our wedding," Elizabeth lied.

"Well, then don't forget my dad Scotty and Kevin, my shrink," Franco suggested.

"Sure, why not..." said Elizabeth as she added Scott and Kevin's names to her list. "Ooooo this is going to be so much FUN! I can't wait to get started!"

~*~o~*~

Sam and her cousin Kiki were having a girl's day out. "How's everything going, Kiki? Is that horrible Dr. Benshe still stalking you?" questioned Sam.

"YES!" Kiki gasped with annoyance. "He's been sending me pictures of his dick ALL day long!"

She showed Sam her phone. Sam viewed the photos that the creepy doc had sent to Kiki. "Ohhh my God!" Sam exclaimed. "It is so small and wrinkly!"

"His penis reminds me of shriveled up chicken drumstick, before it's been cooked! I mean, seriously, who sends out a picture of their puny, ugly dick? Griffin's is so much bigger and it's fun to fuck and suck!"

"WHAT?" Sam gasped. "What do you mean? Did you fuck Griffin, your mother's boyfriend?"

"Well, she fucked Morgan, so I guess we are even now. He said my vagina is cozy and tight."

"Ohhhh my God, Kiki, you didn't?!"

"Don't look so shocked. I heard you did the wild mamba with your mother's ex, the father of your own sister! It's not like your vagina hasn't been regularly plundered!"

Sam let out a little giggle. "Ohhh yeah, I had me some fun with naughty Ric, Sonny's brother. My mom walked in on us when we were humping and pumping. Boy, was she ever mad!"

"Do you have any dick pics of him?" Kiki asked eagerly.

"No, but I have some of Sonny...Jax... Jason...and Drew."

"What? You didn't snap a photo of Ric's dick?"

"Did you snap any of Griffin's? You said his cock was big and fun to fuck and suck," Sam reminded.

Not far away, behind a curtain, Dr. Benshe was listening and recording the conversation. He planned to use it later in a blackmail scheme to get Kiki into his bed. He let out an evil chuckle. He was certain with this delicate information, Kiki wouldn't want it getting out, so she'd spread her legs wide for him instead. Hell, he could probably use it to get Sam into bed as well.

*Two for the price of one!* thought the perverted doctor.

~*~o~*~

Drew was at Pregnancy Hospital, about to get his infusion. Kim, his ex was beside him, holding his hand. "Are you sure you want to do this?" she asked. "Oscar and I would be devastated if anything happened..."

Drew cut her off. "Why? Is there something about my past that you don't want me to know?" Drew asked her suspiciously.

"No...NO...of course not!" Kim insisted. "I am just worried about you. That's ALL."

Drew shook his head. He knew she was lying. Kim looked as though she was horrified of the truth getting out. Whatever the truth might be, he would soon be finding out. Then all the secrets would be exposed.

"Dr. Collins, inject me with the infusion so I can get my memories back," Drew instructed.

Kevin picked up a really huge syringe and rammed it deep into Drew's brain stem. Drew screamed out in terrible pain which seemed to excite the doctor. Dr. Collins was ramming the sharp needle in and out of Drew's flesh relentlessly.

"Ohhh God, Kim... do something to help me with... the pain..." Drew said while in agony.

"Would a blow job be of any help?" Kim offered.

~*~o~*~

In a sleazy little cabin in the woods, Dr O and her niece Nina were torturing their captive. Dr, O rubbed ben-gay on his nuts while Nina filed and painted his nails. "Stop! Ohhh please. It hurts," Peter whined.

Leisel whipped out a man-sized diaper. "Hold still," she hissed as worked the diaper under Peter's hips. "I am so tired of cleaning PEE and POOP off this bed!"

"I tried to hold it in - honestly, I swear! I kept it in as long as possible, fearing I may explode. And finally... I did," Peter spoke with shame.

"Stop talking," Dr.O insisted as she was trying to close the tabs on the giant diaper. Unfortunately, Peter's penis was too big and she wasn't able to properly close the extra-large Pamper.

"Nina, run and get me the hammer," Leisel said, an evil gleam in her eyes.


	2. Episode 2

Episode Two

Nelle waited impatiently for Brad to meet her with an extra-large vial of 'man juice.' "Did you get the stuff?" she asked, acting completely ungrateful despite all of his hard work.

"Yeah, here's an extra large vial. Either you go insert it into your female parts immediately or you put it on ice and make it into a giant sperm-cicle, because if it gets too warm, it won't be useful to impregnate you," replied Brad as he handed over the vial of thick white creme.

"So who's sperm is this? Some handsome hunk of a doctor or a gorgeous guy who works in the hospital lab? It isn't YOURS, is it? Because if it is and my baby is oriental, then Michael is gonna know. He's totally clueless, but he's not THAT dumb."

Brad looked sheepish. He was hoping she wouldn't ask that question. "Actually yeah... it's not mine, but it kind of _is_ mine."

"Huh?! What the hell do you mean...?! Is this your jizz or not?"she questioned as she held the vial out toward him. "Tell me now, Brad, how did you get this sperm? Where did it CUM from?"

"Nelle, I was hoping... since I am helping and all, that after the baby arrives, you could hand it over to me and Lucas? We'd love to have a kid. By then, you'll have Michael all to yourself...and we could make it look like some dumbass kidnapper took your baby, so Michael would feel sorry for you and pamper you in your time of grief."

"That idea isn't half-bad, because I have no desire to raise a kid, nor breastfeed the bawling little bugger until my boobs are huge and saggy plus I would not want to change it's shitty diapers or it's spit-up stained clothes. So yeah, you can have the wretched brat once I have Michael deep into my clutches," Nelle stated. "But you haven't told me yet how you obtained the sperm."

"It's my husband Lucas's," Brad admitted.

"And just how did you get your doctor hubby to spill his jizz into a sterile cup?"

"That's ... That's NOT how it happened."

"Tell ME!" Nelle insisted.

"Okay...okay. Last night we were horny, so I was giving my man one my extra-suction, powerful blow jobs. I usually swallow after he cums, but of course, not this time; I acted as if I got choked on his massive hunk of meat. After Lucas exploded into my mouth, I ran into the bathroom and quickly gathered the sample. When I came out a minute or two later, Lucas asked if I was okay. I responded, 'Yes, I just needed to clear some jizz out of my throat.' True story."

Nelle laughed as Brad explained how he obtained the sample. "I am gonna go right home and insert this vial full of man-juice deep inside my womanly crevice. I hope it does the job... just like you did _the job_ for your hubby."

~*~o~*~

Finn was extremely worried as he hadn't heard from Anna in many days. She had said she was going to visit her daughter Robin and her family, but she hadn't been answering any of his texts or phone calls. *Where could Anna be?* Finn was thinking.

He questioned his lizard Roxie, but she didn't respond. "Roxie, Anna and I are dating. She might be your stepmother soon, so if you know anything... anything at all, you better speak up."

Of course, the lizard did not reply despite Finn's numerous questions. Finn was getting agitated. He wondered if Anna had left because he had been absolutely terrible in bed. He knew he needed viagra for his 'problem,' but he was afraid to try the cock-hardening medication. He wanted to use other methods instead.

"I need to call Anna's daughter and ask her if she's seen Anna. Thanks for giving me the idea, Roxie."

The lizard hadn't given him any suggestions; Finn was more than a little bit kookoo. He had a strong feeling of disorientation or craziness. It had been caused by the excessive misuse of prescription drugs, mexican speedballs, and the green sugary powder obtained from Pixie Stix candy. He had been snorting the green powder up his nose daily in hopes it might help him get an erection. Sadly, it never did. In fact, Finn hadn't been hard at all since the night he impregnated Hayden. He still missed her. Now it appeared as if Anna might have ran away from him, too!

~*~o~*~

Maxie and Lulu were having an awkward fried chicken lunch with Colonel Sanders from the KFC Restaurant. He had followed them home after they had ordered a bucket of chicken at the drive-through window. "WHAT are you doing here?" Maxie asked after she answered the door.

"You just gotta try my fried chicken, ladies. It's finger-looking good."

He made some obscene hand gestures that made Maxie feel quite uncomfortable. It looked like he was deep-throating an immense and extra-crispy chicken leg.

"Lulu, can you believe this guy? He says he's Colonel Sanders of KFC, but he doesn't even LOOK like him!" Maxie exclaimed. "Who are you, strange pervert, and why did you come to my house?"

Lulu too stared at the odd-looking guy as he just walked in, sat down at the table, and started munching on a piece of chicken. It was obvious that the man's get-up was some sort of lame disguise. "Mmmmm... Eleven herbs and spices. I'd love to give one of you beautiful ladies my SECRET recipe."

"What do we have to do for YOU in return?" Lulu asked suspiciously.

Colonel Sanders stroked his mustache as though he were deeply in thought. "Well, there is something special that _one_ of you ladies could do for me," he said.

He looked at Maxie. "There is something that you have that I want... and I intend to get it from you."

~*~o~*~

Elizabeth had just crossed one guy off of her who-to-fuck-next list. She made sure that Sonny Corinthos had been liquored up to the max. When he was completely intoxicated, Elizabeth seduced him with the intention of getting pregnant. She had worn a blond wig so Sonny would believe in his drunken state that he had just had sex with his wife. After her sleazy romp with Sonny, Elizabeth pranced back home to spend an evening with Franco and the boys. Drew would be next. She knew he was an easy lay because he was lonely and incapacitated in the hospital after a risky infusion. He still hadn't woke up yet from his medical procedure, but Elizabeth had ways in which she could 'wake up' his manhood.

After Franco was sound asleep, Elizabeth snuck out, wearing her nurse's uniform. Drew was lying in his hospital bed, seeming exhausted from the ordeal of his infusion. "This patient needs a sponge bath," Elizabeth said.

She opened Drew's hospital gown, revealing his virile, manly body. She took a soapy sponge and began to run it up and down Drew's lifeless cock. It was just a moment or two when Drew produced a flaming boner.

Drew awakened enough to open one of his eyes and stare at Elizabeth. He thought she was an apparition that had come to him in the night. "Pleasure me, pretty nurse," he begged.

Elizabeth pulled up the skirt of her nurse's uniform. She wasn't wearing any panties. She decided to climb onto Drew's bed and ride the wild stallion. After he came inside her, he moaned something incoherent as she kissed his cheek.

"Thank you for fucking me," she said as she picked up her notepad and crossed his name off her list.

She had a fertile window of only two days, so she had to act quickly to make sure she was pregnant. She was smirking as Dr. Griffin Monro was the next man she had written on her list.

~*~o~*~

Dr. Benshe was lurking around the hospital like a stalker, looking for women he might sexually harass. He saw Elizabeth go into a patient's room. He peeked inside, getting quite a show. Elizabeth wore no panties under her nurse's uniform which made Dr. Benshe incredibly horny. He wished Kiki was around so he could stalk her and lick her up and down on one side of her face.

What he didn't know was that Kiki and Sam were on to him. Sam contacted her dad, Julian Jerome who was Ava's brother. "Dr. Benshe has been spying on us...and he recorded a private conversation we were having about our lover's dicks," Sam informed Julian.

"I think it's time that the nasty left on a little trip," Julian said menacingly.

Kim walked into Charlie's just a moment after Julian finished talking to his daughter. "Something on your mind?" he asked as Kim looked troubled.

"Drew had his infusion today...and he still hasn't woken up," she said as she bit her lower lip.

"You look worried."

"Actually I am terrified. What if Drew remembers everything?"

"Do you have secrets you don't want to be revealed?"

"Yes, BIG ones. Really, really big."

"Bigger than my cock?"

"I wouldn't go that far," said Kim with a sexy smirk.

~*~o~*~

"Ewww. Ohhh my God. Peterik has crapped his diaper AGAIN," Leisel said to her niece.

"I don't want to change him!" Nina protested. "I had to last time. It's your turn to wipe his butt."

Leisel grabbed another man-sized Pamper from the box and brought it over to Peter's bed. "Will I get any nice soft powder?" he asked Leisel as she cursed in German while wiping his stinky ass.

She glared at him and said, "You are lucky I don't slice off your schnitzel!"

Peter whimpered and moaned. "But Nina put some powder on my bottom when _she_ changed me. She's so much nicer than you."

"Nina, don't go giving this man any favors. You know what he did to Nathan. He's the reason that Nathan is dead!"

"I thought Faison's bullet was the reason," said Nina.

"Don't go bad-mouthing the father of my children. He was a horrible, homicidal man, but I _loved_ him. I absolutely adored his serial killer ass, so don't you say anything EVER against him. If he walked through that door right now, I'd take him back. I would screw his brains out in a heartbeat."

"If he only _had_ a brain," Nina said under her breath.

"I am sorry that Nathan's dead... truly I am. Can I go home now?" Peter asked. "I am old enough to use the toilet and wipe my own ass."

Leisel gagged him with her sweaty bra so that he would stop his incessant talking. "This cabin smells like a pig sty," she growled. "Nina, get rid off ALL these soiled diapers."

Nina did as she was told, gathering up all of the smelly diapers and putting them in a trash bag. She carried the contents outside and dumped it into the river.


End file.
